Frames wallpaper in the upstairs hallway / New Jersey / March 2007
My Advance Fee Fraud Poem
Greetings and compliments of the season.
This message might meet you in utmost surprise.
I crave your indulgence as I contact you in such a surprising manner.
I NEED YOUR URGENT ASSISTANCE
Your contact was given to me by a reliable friend.
Such opportunities only come ones way once in a lifetime. I cannot let this chance pass me by, for once I find myself in total control of my destiny.
If you give me positive signals, I will initiate this process towards a conclusion.
I will not fail to bring to your notice this transaction is hitch-free and that you should not entertain any atom of fear.
This is the one truth I have learned.
I AWAIT YOUR URGENT REPLY
Trusting to hear from you immediately.
[with apologies to my “dearly friends” Abdel, Emmanuel, Rose, Sali, Yusuf, and Izemaige]